Hodgepodge: Multiple Choices, Senses, and Personalities?

Welcome to this week's spicy, dicey Hodgepodge questions from Joyce.


1. What is something that bothers you if it's not done perfectly?

Crooked-hanging pictures and curtains. In order for me to really relax, they have to be at a certain height, centered, and be both straight and plumb. Our first house was a darling old 1930's duplex with "great bones" and "character" as they say in the biz, but what bothered me badly was that nothing was straight or plumb. Pictures were always going wonky on the walls, and my husband's attempts to hang border near the ceiling usually ended with us saying, "Never again. Our next house will be brand new." (It wasn't. Our next house was a 1940's colonial. Slightly bigger. Much wonkier.)


2. Do you think a 6th sense exists? Explain.

Absolutely, if by "6th sense" you mean "keen intuition, hunch, ability to perceive beyond the five natural senses" (thank you, Wikipedia). To explain, however, I want to be careful how I say this; I don't believe anyone except God "knows" anything for sure, whether perceived by natural or supernatural senses.

I believe that almost all humans possess an innate ability to sense when something is "just not right" or "creepy" or "unnatural." I believe that most parents are given an extra dose of a sixth sense to know when their kids are in trouble or pain or need help, even when they aren't in sight or they're out of earshot. It often "comes out of nowhere" such as when a mom is doing dishes and is suddenly struck with the thought, "They need protection!" or when a father says to his daughter, "I can't give you an exact reason, honey, but trust me on this. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something's not right about this situation. I don't want you to (fill in the blank) or go (fill in the blank)." (Of course, some parents have none, for they lack it on a personal level, but that's a whole 'nother saddening, maddening post.)


When it comes to sense, mothers do one better: We have a seventh sense! It's called MotherGuilt, which I am positive is the generic name for HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin)-- the pregnancy hormone. The thing is, instead of being expelled with the placenta at birth, it latches onto every cell in a mother's body and stays there till her dying day. So, it's the truth: women have more sense than men!

3. Do you say your goodbyes slowly, quickly, or not at all?

It depends. On the phone, it can take me three or four attempts at goodbye to hang up with a good friend. In person, if I'm sad to leave a person I'm with, I dilly-dally getting ready, just to postpone saying the parting words. When I'm forced by the clock to catch a plane or to keep up with my less-sentimental hubby, I usually give quick hugs and try to crack a joke to cover my true emotions. That said, if parting is not such sweet sorrow, I can get the heck outta Dodge pretty dern quick.

4. On a scale of 1-10, with ten being hot hot hot, what level of spice do you like in your food? What's your favorite 'spicy' dish?

Twenty years ago, I could do a 9 but now I'm about a 5. My tastebuds can handle it hotter, but my GI tract rebels. My favorite spicy dish is chile rellenos. I always tell my husband, "I like my food like I like my man--hot, hot, baby!" (He rolls his eyes in an "oh, puh-LEASE" way.)

5. What is one of your all time favorite commercial jingles?

The old jingle for Alka Seltzer was a classic favorite of mine: "Plop, plop. Fizz, fizz. Oh, what a relief it is..." I remember when I was a little girl, my mom used to drink it when she was studying. We didn't buy soft drinks, but she would drop those seltzer tabs into water and we girls would huddle around her glass and watch and listen as they bubbled up with that "shooey-shooey" sound. (Poor kids' entertainment at its best.)

Although, hear me out--Alka Seltzer is TERRIBLE for spicy-food indigestion. It just puts those spices back on the northbound train where they often get stuck during the ascent. Bread and milk are much better absorbers. But if ya really need to belch, by all means, plop-plop and fizz-fizz.

6. Plane, train, boat or auto...your preferred method of travel?

For zippin' around town and within a three-hour radius, I find the auto most practical. For distances beyond four hours, I prefer a plane. In fact, I love to fly! (I was watching "Marriage Ref" the other night and the "problem" was one we as a couple can so relate to. Her husband was the pragmatic breadwinner and she was the visionary globetrotter. Her dream was to see seven countries a year for the rest of her life. Sounds great to me! The main differences between her and me? She wasn't a mother, and when she felt like seeing the world, she'd pack her bags and fly--without him, to Egypt, Dubai, Finland, wherever! Be still my wanderlusting heart! I wouldn't enjoy traveling alone ,though. Half the fun is sharing the adventure and memories, right?

I get a huge thrill at taking off, landing, sitting in clouds, viewing landscapes that resemble the board in the game LIFE. Little tiny cars, cloverleaf highways, gridded farmland. I love the thrill of seeing people I haven't seen in a long time and meeting fellow bloggers in real life, bloggers like Laurie in Kansas and Rachel in the baggage claim of the Dallas/Fort Worth airport! But mostly I love flying because of the adventure, the "where to next?" and "what if?" questions. I love having to answer the in-your-face question, "What if this plane crashes?" and to realize I'd probably die and that's all right because I know where I'm going--straight to heaven.

7. What is something you take for granted?

Freedom of worship. I seldom wake up on Sundays and think what a privilege it is not to have to hide in fear of being caught, imprisoned, or killed. I don't think about it at our mid-week meetings. What a shame to admit that I'm often thinking of what I'll get out of those gatherings, what I'll wear, who will be speaking or singing. God, help me be more mindful of my Christian brothers and sisters who share pages of scripture--literally, in dark basements and deep jungles. Cause me to pray for those who "are in chains" across the globe, and cause them to pray for us in America who take our faith and freedoms for granted.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I finally decided what position to take at the school. I'll be teaching art to the combined 5th/6th grade class. It's a volunteer position until funds become available to pay me. Thank you to those of you who prayed for wisdom. It was a harder decision than I thought, and I woke up this morning still oscillating!

As for the paid jobs, I called the senior home-care company and asked some questions and answered some, too. The nice gentleman who took my call says this kind of work sounds like something that would be a good match for me. In my nervousness, I said, "I think it would fit my personalities very well." I then had to back-pedal real fast: "I mean--I don't have multiple personalities, I mean I think it would fit our personalities--the client's and mine!"

Oh, boy. Nothing like using the term "my multiple personalities" on a cold call.

I Can See Italy From Here, After All !

Last night my husband and I went out to dinner to celebrate his Big Five-O. All the kids had commitments elsewhere, so I had him all to myself. I like it that way sometimes. Those green eyes meeting mine. The conversation uninterrupted by, "Dad. Guess what? Guess what?"

But hey, guess what?

We talked about Italy , and it's back on the map. Well, technically it never left the map, but it's back in our conversation. We had just bid the notion farewell for this August because of the cost to go then and also because it's the worst time to be in that country. And when we wrote it off, we entertained thoughts of a cruise instead, for half the cost. We also had people suggest places like Yosemite, Grand Canyon, and other points of interest with in our borders.

But, we concluded that we really DO want to see Italy more than go on a cruise and want to do it before we're truly old and decrepit. (He said this as he propped up his gout-ridden left toe beside me at the restaurant table.) We really do want to mark our 25th anniversary with it. We would rather take Joel on a tour out West and not connect it w/ our romantic getaway. Besides, hiking out West in August doesn't appeal to either of us. Hiking uphill doesn't either. That's work, not relaxation for us.

As it stands now, we are shooting for Italy in the best month to be there: April. We could probably get our older kids to watch Joel, it'll be after the stress of Ben's wedding in March,
and it will give us time to sock away a bit more cash for it.

So, I am very happy today. Makes me crave garlic, onions, and Roma tomatoes just thinking about it.

Arrivederci, Roma

We've decided not to go to Italy in August after all.


Yes, we--my husband and I--have agreed to delay our trip to Italy. Indefinitely.

The reasons are many, but the two biggest are seasonal and monetary. After really digging in to researching for a trip (including word-of-mouth "advertising") it appears that August would be the worst month to visit.

It is usually hot, and most of Europe goes on holiday, which means many of them go to Italy, and many Italian business owners (hoteliers, restauranteurs, shopkeepers) close their doors to get their own R&R. Some hotels are not air conditioned. I don't do heat very well; Paul doesn't do crowds very well.

Granted, a romantic getaway should involve some hot and sweaty activity. (You people! I'm talking about spelunking, and if you don't know what that is, look it up!)

We've been told that September is the ideal month. Cooler. Shops open. Less crowded. However, it's just not an option because of school starting. August was our only month when we have built-in child care, thanks to our gracious and generous daughter, who was willing to take on that responsibility after the summer classes at college are over.

Who knows? Maybe God will send us a windfall and the opportunity to take our dream vacation sometime after we've celebrated our actual 25th anniversary. But if we were to go now, we'd have to go into debt to afford the costs which are twice in August what my sister Jill paid last November. I regret having gotten my hopes up based on the amazing deal she got-- $1200 per person, airfare and hotel included!

Am I disappointed? Of course.

But--here's a more than a tidbit testimony for ya-- I have a peace in the midst of the disappointment. That part is an answer to my prayer: "Father, give me a peace to accept whatever the outcome without getting angry."

If you knew how closely disappointment and anger are in my emotional make-up, you would realize what grace has been shelled out in this decision. It was actually I who said first to Paul, "I don't think Italy in August is such a wise idea." Normally it's the other way around, Mr. Finance putting the facts to Miss Wanderlust. It was not the Typical Me begging, whining, and having a tantrum over not getting what I really wanted.

Yes, it's only taken 45 years and 10 months to get to this point. (Ask me in late August how I'm doing.)


Arrivaderci, Roma. You shall remain but a dream. And a song. Perhaps I ask-a my groom-a to serenade me with thissa, on our anniversary date-a, which might be more affordable at the Bel-Loc Diner-a than in Italia, anyway-a.

Ciao, Tuscany, at least in my fantasy.

Bye-bye-uh, Venizia, temporarily. I pray for the day we can spend an afternoon...or two...or seven, enjoying your splendor and beauty.

Miscellany Monday: Pranks (Plural) and Other Things Brought to You by the Letter "P"

+++++ ONE +++++

Passports to Pretty Places

My hubby is filling out his passport application! It's fun to see his handwriting on this most official of documents! That means my dreams are closer to reality and if you know me, you know I'm a dreamer with goals, not just a dreamer-dreamer! Most of me is very excited, but part of me is staying in denial so that if our trip to Italy doesn't pan out, I'm not crushed by disappointment. I don't do disappointment very well. Understatement of the year.

+++++TWO++++

Providing for His Pretty

Our son Ben and his fiancee are looking for an apartment to rent when they're married. I can't believe I just wrote that sentence. Words like these still seem surreal. Wasn't it just last year that we were talking about T-ball game strategies, the reasons why we (are supposed to) use napkins instead of shirt fronts at the table, and how to give a proper handshake? Now my future daughter-in-law sits beside me on the sofa, heart all aflutter as she shows me photos and blueprints of apartments they looked at this weekend, and tells me about closet space and community pools. Meanwhile our son bemoans the cost, cheers the proximity to work and Dee's future school, and debates the pros and cons with us of renting vs. owning a home. Okay, moving right along (no pun intended, really!) ... too much emotion gunks up the keyboard.

+++++THREE+++++
"Prospective Parents"

Our daughter Sarah, whose major is Early Childhood Ed, has taken a keen interest in the new school where her little brother will probably attend this fall. When I read the email to her that "the meeting is for prospective parents," she replied, "Um, you guys aren't prospective parents. You're already parents. I'm pretty sure there won't be any prospective parents there, unless they're getting a really early start on their kids' education!"

+++++FOUR+++++

Paddle boats and Practical Jokes

Here's my funny editor-girl going paddle-boating with her friend, Kerry, at the Inner Harbor last Saturday night.

Sarah, Kerry, Steve, and Ambrey all went to the Inner Harbor for Kerry's sake. She had never been (she's from out-of-state). So those four kids (they'll always be "kids" to me) piled into the van and went to Baltimore for a night on the town. All four love practical jokes, so they conspired to pull a fast one on passersby--tourists who just happened to be in the "right place at the right time." The joke would be that Steve would take Ambrey to the water's edge, get down on one knee, and propose marriage. The main difference would be that he'd pretend to mutter some heartfelt words but end with "Will you ...take a picture with me?" She played right along, hands waving in mock shock, wiping fake tears, the whole bit. (I don't know what's funnier, the prank, or the girls' laughter while videotaping it.)

Some people did stop and stare, but there was no dance mob. Maybe next time?

The real joke was on ME, though, because when Sarah was telling me about it the next day, I didn't catch the part that Ambrey was in on it. I thought Steve was pranking Ambrey, and I said, "Oh, that's just mean! Poor girl! Look at her waving her hands and everything!" (I tried uploading the video, but it's giving an error note, so I'll try again later. Stay tuned.)

+++++PRANKS++++

Following in his brother's humorous footsteps, Joel decided to pull a prank on Steve, who'd be going back to his apartment to pack up for the summer away. Joel sneaked out to the Jeep while his brother was showering, and proceeded to write messages on his windows with window chalk. I was laughing right along with him.

Italy

So I wrote a post with details about this trip to Italy and it vanished. I rewrote it. Vanished. Found previous one but Blogger wouldn't let me publish or save. Ergh! It wouldn't let me save the title to draft, but rather went ahead and posted it. I feel silly.

So here's the short version. Paul and I will be married 25 years in December, and want to celebrate with a big trip. My heart's desire was France or Italy; his was a Caribbean cruise, France, or Italy. The more I gleaned from people who'd experienced it, either country would be a fine choice. However, the one with the "edge" in the 'competition" was Italy (friendlier, more relaxing) and I guess the clincher for me is the food. I love Italian food. And we would both love to see Rome.

December is not a great month for traveling (low temps, high stress) so we plan to go in mid-August when we have coverage for Joel. We decided to go now while we're still young enough to get around on our own legs with the (fairly) good knees that God gave us, not put it off till we have "everything just so" because that time never comes. We have no debt and Paul has a good bit of vacation time allotted to him. The new school that Joel will probably be attending is costing only 1/4 of the other alternatives, so that's not a sweaty deal to us.

It's a blessing to have the freedom to travel at this time in our lives, and we are jumping at the chance.

I'm so excited! This will be an answer to many years of prayer for a trip overseas to put the Rome in Romance for our marriage! Not that it takes a trip to do that, but it sure doesn't hurt!