So I thought I was just going to take a break and come back here Tuesday, but my laptop is nearly kaput and we need to back it up and not use it until that happens, or else risk losing a lot.
I've been reading facebook and blogs (and commenting a teeny bit) on the little tablet we have, but it's kind of a pain, and I can't post on Blogger with it. Probably a good thing. I have had a huge lot on my proverbial plate this week, both logistically and emotionally. When I'm on overload all I want to do is escape to sleep, blog, read, eat, run (as in away). Sometimes I pray, but why is it that all I can sometimes muster is "Help, Lord!"? And why is it just sometimes -- a last resort when I have at my disposal more than I could ever ask for or even imagine, since my God is exceedingly and abundantly able to supply all I need?
I have been concerned, not in a funny way, about my memory. I am not recalling some of the simplest things. I'm forgetting what I said to whom and am always asking, "Did I tell you this already?" because I know how annoying it is to hear the same old story from someone who just loves to talk. Or I remember an event or a conversation in a way that no one else remembers it, so I'm wrong. I try not to take it personally when it feels like the people in the right are ganging up on me, but it feels like I'm acquiescing and aging at the same time (giving up control and losing control at the same time). It's one more way the Lord is showing me my mortality and His omniscient sovereignty. I should probably take a class to get my brain working harder, to force it to engage like a muscle.
Emotionally the cancer diagnosis hit me hard yesterday. The call from my sister-in-law came just before a big combo party I was hosting for my mom's 70th, Joel's 10th, and Sarah's graduation/new job combo celebration. My brother-in-law has a long road ahead in fighting melanoma. And those in the fight with him feel rather inept, especially from a distance. My husband also received word from his doctor that his lungs are hyperinflated, which is an early sign of COPD. Are you kidding me?
Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease? Isn't that a smoker's disease? My man is a runner and has never smoked! How can it be? Well, I am praying that it isn't so, that the pulmonologist will say it was merely bronchitis that swelled his lungs. I will deny and deny and deny until I hear it from two sources. Or three. Or fourteen hundred. That's how I am.
Okay, I'm at the library and promised my son I'd be off at 4:30. It is 4:30, so I'll keep my word.
Anybody want me to answer this week's Hodgepodge late?