O is for Obsequious

I don't have enough to say about the people I've met whose names (or nicknames) begin with the letter O. Not enough to write a whole post on any of them, I should say. My memories of a woman named Ona can be summed up in the word "disciplined" while memories of someone else's Dutch grandparents ("Oma" and "Opa") could be summed up with "faithfulness."

Therefore I will omit a tribute today.

What I really need to do is to omit blogging from my daily life for a while. In fact, I am pretty sure I will be doing a reverse sort of challenge in May. For April the challenge is to blog every day except Sunday (with the exception of April 1 which happened to be the kickoff Sunday). Essentially that's four days off of blogging in April.

In May, I'll try the opposite--ONLY blogging four days. While writing these legacy posts is a wonderful exercise for expressing my heart to the world (and to the individuals I've honored), I must confess it's not easy to keep up this pace. Outrageous. Obsequious. Ostentacious. (I don't recall the meaning of obsequious, but it's fun to say.)


I'm overwhelmed and overcome sometimes by the grace of God in my life through the influence of dozens and dozens of people. I've also been off-the-charts curious (call it overactively intropsective) about what legacy I am leaving. The conclusions are obviously negative to me.

"She was ordinarily online."
"Her obliques were obsolete."
"She was overchatty and overweight."
"She was overtly obsessed with grammar, spelling, and punctuation. OCD.""She opted out of organizing and cleaning too often."
"She had a lot of personal power outages."

Lately I've been oscillating between condemnation and conviction.

Condemnation says, "You're old, obese, and obstinate. What good are you? Might as well give up on impacting anyone for good. No one really cares that much anyway. You'll be forgotten soon enough. Gain weight, lose weight, what does it matter? Serve people and they might or might not say thanks. Is it worth the effort to serve ungrateful people? Might as well do what YOU enjoy. You only go around once. Eat, drink, and be merry!"

Conviction says:

1. "Teach us to number our days, that we may may gain a heart of wisdom."
2. "Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit; now glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are His.
3. "Serve one another and do not grow weary in doing good."
4. "For the Son of God came not to be served, but to serve."
5. "I have loved you with an everlasting love."
6. "Freely you have been given; freely give."
7. "To whom much is given, much is required."
8. "My grace is sufficient for you."
9. "If you chase after worthless idols, you forfeit the grace that could be yours."
10. "Offer yourself as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable unto God, for this is your reasonable service." (I tend to think that my duties are just unreasonable. Au contraire. (Oh, contrare.)
11. "To obey is better than sacrifice."


Pardon my omission of biblical references. The eleven quotes above are taken from scripture--God's holy oracle-- and are memorized, sans reference.

I intend to finish up my April A to Z challenge because there's half-an-alphabet's worth of people that I want to say a few (or more) words about. Then I plan to operate in other ways--more organization in the home, to be sure, but what's the highest priority? Returning to my First Love, God ,the Alpha and Omega. I've neglected time with Him. I used to so enjoy having coffee and scripture reading first thing in the morning. It was like taking a long, hot bath in grace. It's been months since I experienced that. (And going months without a bath? OY! There is a "distinkt" odor about even a servant who doesn't bathe regularly!)

Also, I want to be "visiting orphans and widows in their distress." How? By writing letters to our sponsor children, having coffee with a widowed friend of mine and glean wisdom on good marriage from her, encouraging my friend Bonnie in Africa (see link in my sidebar) as she ministers to orphans, praying more actively for our pastor and his wife who are in the process of adopting four orphaned brothers from Brazil). Orphans abandoned by father, mother, or both, because of drugs, disease, dysfunction, divorce, or death. (Obnoxious alliteration? My ap-ologies.) As the pastor pointed out, there are over 150 million orphans worldwide. Reread that sentence 150,000,000 times and see if you aren't moved. We have the privilege and onus of caring for them somehow, some way.

Oh, the overabundance that is life! Opportunities overflow. And so, fellow bloggers whom I delight in "seeing" and "hearing" daily, I am setting a different course in the upcoming month. It won't be easy. We all know that the "spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." By omitting blogging except for four days in May (on which days I might go on wild outbursts posting things I've pent up inside), I hope to leave a legacy of obedience motivated by love for the One who loves me with an everlasting love, who doesn't love me less if I never raise another finger, or doesn't love me more if I obey him with everything that is in me. If there's one thing I've learned from writing these legacies, it's this: a legacy is formed by whatever a person does over and over. I really need God's help to obey Him over and over, so that I don't forfeit the grace that could be mine.

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PS. I went back and looked up the word "obsequious." It means "eager to please or obey." God has a sense of humor, doesn't He?

Under Attack

Make no mistake. Scripture memory is a trumpet call to Satan's army to swing into battle. I have been under attack since January 1 when I started thinking about serious
memorizing. It was the number one reason that I was reluctant to start.

On the one hand, it's quite euphoric to know you're taking up arrows against him. On the other hand, it's no picnic to feel you're filleted like a piece of venison on the ground while hearing the whoosh of his arrows shooting back.

The typical areas where I'm vulnerable, where he heaps gobs of guilt on me are:

-my weight and failure to lose in the past few months, having come to a standstill and then putting some back on. I have been too ashamed to post pictures of myself.
-my relationships--I am hypersensitive to lies about being unlovable.
-my skills -- I suddenly feel I can't do anything worthwhile, not in my home, my school, my church, the world.


And I battle it with more scripture and then rejoice in the God of my salvation again.
He tells me He is for me, He loves me, that no matter what I hear, the truth is that some people love me and others even like me. And he reminds me that all I have , even skills, come from him, and that I need to be faithful with the number and kind He has allotted me.

I'm just sayin'.

The memorizing is going well, but I am feeling like shutting myself off from everyone when Satan flings his dung. So please pray.

Making a Habit of Habukkuk

Okay, corny title. What did you expect?

Just wanted to give an update on my scripture memory of Habakkuk 3. I can say I was tempted to cut the full 19 verses down to a more manageable chunk --like four-- but I was making excuses. Yes, it's a challenge, but I have had some wonderful times alone in my home, pretending to be Habukkuk recounting God's mighty acts that He performed in and around Mt. Sinai.

What makes it easy to remember (compared to other parts of the Bible) is all the personification and the action-packed imagery. Flashing rays, glittering spears, speeding arrows. The head of the house of the wicked being split open from thigh to neck. Clint Eastwood, have you thought of directing a major motion picture from a minor 'motional prophet?

Sunday morning I was awakened by Ben at 5:15. He was leaving for the Ravens playoff game in Massuchusetts six hours away with his dad. From that moment on, I couldn't sleep, though I surely wanted to. God had other ways for me to steward the morning: meditating and memorizing more!

I found myself fairly zipping through the verses, peeking now and then, delivering a soliloquy to an audience of One. Even if it's not word perfect (I'm trying), I find the "meat" of it so powerful I just applaud God. He has done so much for us. He went out for the salvation of His people, for the salvation of His anointed. (It harkens to the question from the NT, "If God be for us, who can be against us?") The vindication is scary and comforting all at once.

Pray I use self-control against time-wasters (namely computer) and prize more things of eternal value. "His are the everlasting ways."

Call Me Shigionoth

As if "Zoanna" weren't a weird enough name.

Inspired by the powerful recitation of Psalm 22 by Ryan Ferguson, I've found it easier to memorize Habakkuk 3 by dramatizing it aloud in my quiet time, putting hand motions and inflection that try to convey the emotions. The imagery in this chapter is gripping--vivid verbs, strong adjectives, spot-on similes. (Then again, everything in the Bible is spot-on, huh? I mean, consider the Author and Editor.) The words are getting into me as I am getting into them!

Habakkuk 3: 1 A prayer of Habakkuk the prophet, according to Shigionoth.
2 O LORD, I have heard the report of you, and your work, O LORD, do I fear. In the mist of the years revive it, in the midst of the years make it known, in wrath remember mercy.
3 God came from Teman, and the Holy One from Mount Paran. His splendor covered the heavens, and the earth was full of his praise.
4 His brightness was like the light; rays flashed from his hand, and there he veiled his power.
5 Before him went pestilence, and plaque followed at his heels.
6 He stood and measured the earth; he looked and shook the nations;
then the eternal mountains were scattered,
the everlasting hills sank low.
His were the everlasting ways.

My thoughts thus far:

vs 2 --One thing I am praying for this year is to see God revive His church, beginning with me. To love Him passionately, to serve Him wholeheartedly, to believe Him actively. And when change and revival aren't happening fast enough (within or without) and I'm tempted toward wrath, may I remember mercy, too, as God does.

vs 3-- Must look these up because I know God didn't "come from" anywhere. I just am unfamiliar with the Hebrew background. I asked my dad and he said he'll look it up in Stern's. My mom my already know, but she's in New Mexico caring for her post-op sister.

vs 4 -- I picture the rays flashing from His hand, so bright that His power behind them is veiled as if by a solar eclipse. "You ain't seen nuttin' yet" is the phrase I equate with this verse. My Superhero just waiting in the wings to unleash all His powers.

vs 5. Pied Piper, only better. I see diseases and problems marching like little ants, not rats, before and behind Jesus's feet, oblivious to His boots. He is ready to smash them in a single step forward or backward. He either is watching them with the control of a head coach, or is commanding them to stay behind Him. Either way He is watching and controlling.

vs 6 I picture His arms measuring the earth and it's the size of a shoebox. He looked and shook the nations, mountains scattered, hills sank low. His (point your index finger high when you say that!--HIS are the everlasting ways.

God, thank You for Your power. Thank You for Your sovereignty. Thank You for never taking Your eyes off me, for not utterly smashing me like an ant, but for crushing Your Son for my evil, my sin, for putting Satan in his rightful place (which is the Place Without Rights), for having such self-control that You withhold Your wrath from me and instead treat me with endless love and covenant kindness. You would do anything for me because You've already done everything for me! I am weeping with gratitude.

I'll bet Shigionoth wept, too.

MMM: Habakkuk 3

Once again, by way of Amy's prompting, I will be joining in the Mega Memory Month. Last January I memorized Philippians 2:1-18.

Both last year and this, when I read about MMM, I dragged my heels, made excuses, and then prayed for grace to tackle a chunk of verses. Oh, if I'd only skip the first two things and head right for the throne of grace.

Memorizing is not too terribly hard for me; I have a photogenic memory:) I mean photographic. I can make up mnemonics for myself and have learned various tricks over the years for memorizing different things.

What keeps me from plunging headlong into memorizing more of the Bible? Fear of attack. It's the knowledge that once I start, Satan will go on the offensive. He always does when God's child wants to scootchy up into Abba's lap and learn more or take up arms against the devil through scripture .

I've decided that, since I am making an effort to ponder God's majesty this year, that I would start by memorizing Habakkuk 3. I will be doing so in the ESV.

Poetic and powerful, it'll be the perfect start to MMM for me.

How about you? Will you join? "Mega" scripture is different for everyone. For me it's more than three verses at a time. Habakkuk 3 has 19 verses, and by God's grace, I can memorize it in a month.

Here it is over at Bible Gateway.

New Year, New Discipline: Memorizing Scripture in 2009

Foray: to invade or make one's way, as for profit or adventure

My friend Amy issued a challenge to memorize larger chunks of material, not necessarily scripture, but certainly that's the most eternally profitable literature in all of life. I mean, can you top God's living Word?

I have wiggled and squirmed every time the Lord has prompted me to make a concerted effort to memorize more than a verse here and there in my adult life. I was really good at memorizing scripture as a kid, and am so thankful for all the VBS challenges, Christian school requirements in Bible class, the Bible quiz team that demanded a minimum of 50 verses learned in order to compete intrascholastically.

Then came college. Marriage. Kids. Excuses. I am 43, and though still married and mothering, I am out of college and excuses. The Lord put His finger on the discipline I need most for my growth in Him right now. Having heard His voice through many human voices on this topic, I can't squirm any more. Thanks, Amy, for being the most recent, most motivational voice.

I decided there was no right or wrong place to start. I do know I need to grow in humility, so I chose Philippians 2. I am committing to memorizing verses 1-11. I started on the first two this morning. Making pictures and patterns in my mind comes fairly easily, and that's what I am doing to tackle this bucket o' Bible verses.

Phil. 2: 1-11

1So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love,
any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, 2
complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love,
being in full accord and of one mind. 3Do nothing from
rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than
yourselves. 4Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also
to the interests of others. 5 Have this mind among yourselves, which is
yours in Christ Jesus 6 who,
though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a
thing to be grasped, 7but made himself nothing, taking the form of a
servant being
born in the likeness of men. 8And being found in human form, he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to the point of death,
even death on a cross. 9 Therefore God has highly exalted him
and bestowed on him the
name that is above every name, 10so that at the name of Jesus every knee should
bow in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess
that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.