Halloween Memories

I'm participating (one day late) in Friday Flashbacks, courtesy of Mocha with Linda.

What was Halloween like when you were growing up? Did your family participate? If not, was there a substitute activity?

The first Halloween I remember was when I was in third grade. We all got excited about the forthcoming costume parade in the cafeteria. I wanted to be Miss America. My mom helped me find a long, pretty dress, a sparkly silver tiara, and "high heels" (white Easter sandals). Well, the night before the occasion, Mama suggested I carry a bouquet on my arm. But we were poor and it was October and didn't have flowers. I had my heart set on carrying flowers, but how could we make it happen?

My dad, never one to disappoint his daughters if it could possibly be avoided, asked one of his parishioners (a lady with an abundance of bloom all over her yard) if he could pick some of her flowers for me, and she sweetly agreed. The next morning, Daddy took me by the hand to this lady's house a block away. He stooped down among the geraniums, roses, mums, and sunflowers, scissors in hand, and asked me--stem by stem--"This one? Do you like it?" If I nodded, he snipped it. If I hesitated, he moved on to the next. So patient my daddy. It must have taken 15 minutes to satisfy my desire for a huge, glamorous bouquet. But this garden was like Eden to me. I made one last stop at the house to get my lunch, go to the bathroom, and gather my books (and probably adore myself in the mirror again). But somewhere in the transition from home to bus to school cafeteria, I laid the flowers down and didn't have them when the parade music started. All my hopes for waving like a beauty queen in front of the student body turned to puddles of tears. I couldn't wave. I couldn't do that model-walk thing. I could just cry and drag my Easter feet around on Halloween.

Did your school or church have a fall festival or carnival? Our Baptist church when I was a teenager had one. (Daddy was not a pastor at that time.)It seemed odd and kind of wrong to me that a church would go to that much trouble, time and creativity to turn the Sunday school wing into a haunted house. We never put that much energy into serving the poor or homeless.

Were there stipulations regarding costumes? No.

What sorts of activities did they have? I don't remember much. I was kind of creeped out.

What about Halloween parties? Have you ever bobbed for apples or been on a hayride? I remember many a fall party in our youth group. Bonfires, roasted marshmallows, singing praise songs to Christ while dressed like Yoko Ono. Every year we went for a hayride at Mr. Pennington's farm. Every year he pulled the same stunt--pretending the tractor ran out of gas just as we crossed the creek and were starting to climb the embankment. I remember he fooled me into tasting an unripe persimmon while we were waiting on the 'broken down" tractor. Try it. You'll be the center of attention.

What are your memories of "haunted houses"? (I'm not referring to the ultra-scary, secular ones, just the fun kid ones, with bowls of grapes and cold spaghetti!) My mom turned our musty cement basement into a haunted house once. Grape eyeballs, spaghetti brains. Yeh, good ole 1970s ingenuity.

If you went trick-or-treating, what were the rules, both for trick-or-treating and for candy consumption? In our little rural town, everyone knew everyone, so the only rules were "stay together." No adult supervision necessary. We weren't supposed to go to the haunted house across from Newt's Garage, but we did anyway. Scared the punkin outta me! When we moved to Maryland --I was in fifth grade--, living in farm country, trick-or-treating lost its appeal to me. The glory days were over.

Rules for candy consumption? None. My parents were pretty lax at Halloween. If we threw up, we learned our lesson.

What types of costumes did you wear? In fourth grade, for some reason, my mom let me be Marilyn Monroe. I was a PK, remember. Anyway....

Were they store-bought or homemade? Homemade. The most important part of the costume to me was the um...."girls"...made out of L'eggs eggs. One night I went bobbing for apples with other kids at a party and, while my face was in the cold water, one of my "girls" fell out on the ground. To this day, I call the activity "boobing for apples."

Did you carve a jack-o-lantern? Yes. Always smiling faces.

How are your children's experiences similar or different to yours? We had convictions and fears against celebrating it when our older kids were little. Our neighbors were generous anyway, and gave my kids candy AHEAD of time. As we got older, Paul and I relaxed on the legalistic stance we'd taken. He's never been into it; it's always been me taking the kids around the 'hood, which is fine.

And the most important question: Do you like candy corn? Not really, but I eat it anyway. What is your favorite (and least favorite!) Halloween candy? Take Five bars. I just love them. But now that I know what I know (see post below on Cheap Chocolate) I am feeling very differently, restless in my spirit. It's the one thing I've really taken away from this Halloween season: the purchase of cheap chocolate. This is a toughie for me. It's not like I'm wrestling with whether to give up eggplant or tofu.

I still love to dress up and love giving and getting candy. I love to see people's creativity with costumes and themes. But I don't buy spider decor or inflate tacky white "Boo" ghosts on the lawn, none of that. I'm not offended by it, but think it's a waste of money. I prefer to decorate with flowers. It's what you do when your memories of your sweet, handsome daddy stooping to gather pretty blooms for his little Miss America.