Hodgepodge: Multiple Choices, Senses, and Personalities?

Welcome to this week's spicy, dicey Hodgepodge questions from Joyce.


1. What is something that bothers you if it's not done perfectly?

Crooked-hanging pictures and curtains. In order for me to really relax, they have to be at a certain height, centered, and be both straight and plumb. Our first house was a darling old 1930's duplex with "great bones" and "character" as they say in the biz, but what bothered me badly was that nothing was straight or plumb. Pictures were always going wonky on the walls, and my husband's attempts to hang border near the ceiling usually ended with us saying, "Never again. Our next house will be brand new." (It wasn't. Our next house was a 1940's colonial. Slightly bigger. Much wonkier.)


2. Do you think a 6th sense exists? Explain.

Absolutely, if by "6th sense" you mean "keen intuition, hunch, ability to perceive beyond the five natural senses" (thank you, Wikipedia). To explain, however, I want to be careful how I say this; I don't believe anyone except God "knows" anything for sure, whether perceived by natural or supernatural senses.

I believe that almost all humans possess an innate ability to sense when something is "just not right" or "creepy" or "unnatural." I believe that most parents are given an extra dose of a sixth sense to know when their kids are in trouble or pain or need help, even when they aren't in sight or they're out of earshot. It often "comes out of nowhere" such as when a mom is doing dishes and is suddenly struck with the thought, "They need protection!" or when a father says to his daughter, "I can't give you an exact reason, honey, but trust me on this. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something's not right about this situation. I don't want you to (fill in the blank) or go (fill in the blank)." (Of course, some parents have none, for they lack it on a personal level, but that's a whole 'nother saddening, maddening post.)


When it comes to sense, mothers do one better: We have a seventh sense! It's called MotherGuilt, which I am positive is the generic name for HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin)-- the pregnancy hormone. The thing is, instead of being expelled with the placenta at birth, it latches onto every cell in a mother's body and stays there till her dying day. So, it's the truth: women have more sense than men!

3. Do you say your goodbyes slowly, quickly, or not at all?

It depends. On the phone, it can take me three or four attempts at goodbye to hang up with a good friend. In person, if I'm sad to leave a person I'm with, I dilly-dally getting ready, just to postpone saying the parting words. When I'm forced by the clock to catch a plane or to keep up with my less-sentimental hubby, I usually give quick hugs and try to crack a joke to cover my true emotions. That said, if parting is not such sweet sorrow, I can get the heck outta Dodge pretty dern quick.

4. On a scale of 1-10, with ten being hot hot hot, what level of spice do you like in your food? What's your favorite 'spicy' dish?

Twenty years ago, I could do a 9 but now I'm about a 5. My tastebuds can handle it hotter, but my GI tract rebels. My favorite spicy dish is chile rellenos. I always tell my husband, "I like my food like I like my man--hot, hot, baby!" (He rolls his eyes in an "oh, puh-LEASE" way.)

5. What is one of your all time favorite commercial jingles?

The old jingle for Alka Seltzer was a classic favorite of mine: "Plop, plop. Fizz, fizz. Oh, what a relief it is..." I remember when I was a little girl, my mom used to drink it when she was studying. We didn't buy soft drinks, but she would drop those seltzer tabs into water and we girls would huddle around her glass and watch and listen as they bubbled up with that "shooey-shooey" sound. (Poor kids' entertainment at its best.)

Although, hear me out--Alka Seltzer is TERRIBLE for spicy-food indigestion. It just puts those spices back on the northbound train where they often get stuck during the ascent. Bread and milk are much better absorbers. But if ya really need to belch, by all means, plop-plop and fizz-fizz.

6. Plane, train, boat or auto...your preferred method of travel?

For zippin' around town and within a three-hour radius, I find the auto most practical. For distances beyond four hours, I prefer a plane. In fact, I love to fly! (I was watching "Marriage Ref" the other night and the "problem" was one we as a couple can so relate to. Her husband was the pragmatic breadwinner and she was the visionary globetrotter. Her dream was to see seven countries a year for the rest of her life. Sounds great to me! The main differences between her and me? She wasn't a mother, and when she felt like seeing the world, she'd pack her bags and fly--without him, to Egypt, Dubai, Finland, wherever! Be still my wanderlusting heart! I wouldn't enjoy traveling alone ,though. Half the fun is sharing the adventure and memories, right?

I get a huge thrill at taking off, landing, sitting in clouds, viewing landscapes that resemble the board in the game LIFE. Little tiny cars, cloverleaf highways, gridded farmland. I love the thrill of seeing people I haven't seen in a long time and meeting fellow bloggers in real life, bloggers like Laurie in Kansas and Rachel in the baggage claim of the Dallas/Fort Worth airport! But mostly I love flying because of the adventure, the "where to next?" and "what if?" questions. I love having to answer the in-your-face question, "What if this plane crashes?" and to realize I'd probably die and that's all right because I know where I'm going--straight to heaven.

7. What is something you take for granted?

Freedom of worship. I seldom wake up on Sundays and think what a privilege it is not to have to hide in fear of being caught, imprisoned, or killed. I don't think about it at our mid-week meetings. What a shame to admit that I'm often thinking of what I'll get out of those gatherings, what I'll wear, who will be speaking or singing. God, help me be more mindful of my Christian brothers and sisters who share pages of scripture--literally, in dark basements and deep jungles. Cause me to pray for those who "are in chains" across the globe, and cause them to pray for us in America who take our faith and freedoms for granted.

8. Insert your own random thought here.

I finally decided what position to take at the school. I'll be teaching art to the combined 5th/6th grade class. It's a volunteer position until funds become available to pay me. Thank you to those of you who prayed for wisdom. It was a harder decision than I thought, and I woke up this morning still oscillating!

As for the paid jobs, I called the senior home-care company and asked some questions and answered some, too. The nice gentleman who took my call says this kind of work sounds like something that would be a good match for me. In my nervousness, I said, "I think it would fit my personalities very well." I then had to back-pedal real fast: "I mean--I don't have multiple personalities, I mean I think it would fit our personalities--the client's and mine!"

Oh, boy. Nothing like using the term "my multiple personalities" on a cold call.