I have a good friend who suffers with RLS--Restless Legs Syndrome. Some nights she feels she's gonna jump out of her skin. She can't sleep, read, or concentrate on anything else until her meds kick in and her legs settle down.
Spiritually I can identify. For a long, long time I've had Restless Spiritual Legs Syndrome.
I so much want to be a full-time missionary overseas where life is bare bones simple. But my husband is not called that way (that I can see) and I am discontent with the same-old/same-old.
I want a big adventure, something to do with my life that might actually mean suffering for the gospel. My suffering is usually self-induced (you know, waawaawaa, poorly-attended pity parties). My life is way too comfortable but I feel more distant than ever from people in my sphere of influence. What's wrong with that picture? I can't always discern the cause (physical, mental, spiritual, all of the above). All I know is there is a restlessness inside of me that won't quit. A longing to make the most of what God's given me, to have eyes to see my blessings, ears to hear, an obedient and patient heart, a desire to see Him increase and my self decrease, a great desire to see suffering of children CEASE worldwide. I've grown tired of hearing and talking about doing but not actually doing more. I can only hear so many messages, attend so many Christian functions (albeit good ones like care group and ladies' meetings). The most satisfying thing is getting outside the local church and into the local streets with the life-changing message of salvation. I've tasted it and want to tell someone. Not tell them to come to church, but to come to Christ, and then they'll figure out (thru the Holy Spirit's power) that they need fellowship.
For Restless Spiritual Legs Syndrome, it's easy to want to just jump from thing to thing. To not be still and know that God is God.
But like my friend, RSLS won't subside until the meds kick in. I know that my spiritual medicine is God's Word. It's my balm in Gilead. Time to take another dose!
2 comments:
I pray God would show you where he wants you to put those legs into action! If he's behind this "discontent," he'll make his plan known to you. God often makes us discontent with status quo when he wants to do something different in our lives. It's usually there for a reason and he wants our obedience.
Matt and I were just discussing last night how we sometimes desire to "suffer for the gospel" in circumstances other than the ones we've been given...only to realize that God has called us to suffer for the gospel exactly where He has placed us (in our case, our jobs, coworkers, families, etc). Our sinful hearts were saying "God...don't you know I'd rather suffer doing ___?" as if we know better than God!
Praying God would show you with clarity where He would have you to go!
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