Friday, January 30, 2009

Bull or No Bull?

City slickers. That's all I could think of as I watched a news report on WJZ TV tonight. The reporter was throwing around a bunch of bovine terms he knew little to nothing about. He had the sad news to report of a Texas Longhorn "bull" being shot to death by a frightened Maryland state trooper today because it had threatened to kill the deputy in front of him.

True story. (Mind you , in my head a dying cow is singing, "I got shot by the sheriff, but I didn't get shot by the deputee-ee.")

So the reporter makes a few flubs in animal vocab. It's just terminology. But it's funny to me . You country folks will probably laugh, too, if you don't cry over the butchering of mixed genders in this piece.

Here's my paraphrase of his story. (See how many blunders in cow talk you can find. Never mind that Doe is a deer, but I used it in place of the real dude's name.)

Snow-laden trees toppled over on Mr. Farmer's property early this morning, taking out a line of fence. Some cows got out, three to be exact. They are Texas longhorns and both males and females have long horns. Maryland Deputy John Doe responded to the call . When he arrived, he began to try to get the cattle back where they belonged. At one point, a heifer who felt cornered, lowered his head and charged the deputy. The bull knocked the deputy down to the ground. The trooper who came along for assistance said they're intimidating animals.
"I felt I had no choice but to use deadly force against him." says the trooper. "I was afraid the steer would kill my deputy," said the sheriff. "I had a clear shot of the cow and thought I should kill him."
"Farmer X is understandably upset about this," emphathized the reporter. "The bull he shot was due to have a calf in a couple weeks," said the reporter.


Karen said...

it's kind of like "back at the barnyard" where the male bovine has an udder and can shoot milk. sigh way to confuse a generation.. maybe the reporter got his cattle education by watching this movie??

Kelly said...

Huh. It makes ya wonder...
Let's just be thankful he's not a vet in training or something...

Leanne said...

That was funny! Pet peeve: when people try to make you think that they know their subject matter when they do not!