Thursday, June 18, 2009

Anticipation

"Something's coming
I don't know
What it is
But it is
Gonna be great."

These words from the hit musical "West Side Story" are ringing in my head. Last night a couple of sisters in Christ asked how they could be praying for me. I mentioned a couple of specific needs right off the cuff, but then told them of a vague and blurry vision of something I am being called to in the sense of mercy ministry. I can't put my finger on it. You can probably identify: when God has given you a gift that isn't being tapped, and then he taps you, but doesn't clarify it right away, you wait. You wait with eagerness and joy and a bit of fear and apprehension that life is suddenly going to be different. Scary at first, but better in the long run.

Maybe you're old enough to remember the commercial for very thick Heinz ketchup where the person holding the bottle over their burger or fries is waiting, and the little jingle goes, "Anticipation is making me wait." And then the plop of ketchup is worth the seeming eternity it took to reach the bun.

I feel like I'm holding the bottle of ketchup but the contents are invisible.
Anticipation is making me wait.

Perhaps this stirring comes from reminiscing on my missions trip to Russia in 2007 with Sarah. It was June, like now, when my heart swelled with compassion for orphans, and for those oppressed by spiritual blindness and bad theology,
and with anger that the Church and I were not actively keeping abreast of the poor and suffering. I lament that I have fits and spurts of caring; my heart does not beat steadily as Christ's does. There is a "hole in my gospel" as I read recently in the World Vision newsletter.

Sometimes I just want to give everything away and live by faith alone.
Other times I love the affluence of American culture.
Sometimes I weep over the memories I have from visiting Russian orphanages. Or from visiting preteens there in "social rehab centers," as they're called.
Other times I pay no mind to the oppressed people in my own neighborhood because I don't care enough to pray for them.

I am praying that God would make it clear what I am supposed to be doing with this anticipation, this stirring of the mercy gift He has put in me.

Something's coming,
I don't know
what it is,
But it is
Gonna be great.

4 comments:

Laurie Lynn said...

Okay! How could I resist one of my favorite versions of the "Something's Coming"? I first heard it on Barbara's "Broadway Album"... (You'll have to copy/paste in address bar, I think)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iI7VIrnCSZI&feature=related

Here is a live energetic version... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bxjih-WMjDg

Blessed Sweet Anticipation!
Surely God has put a burning within your heart!
Yes, Something's Coming, when God is leading, and it's gonna be great! (whether actively going somewhere or staying put praying etc.!) "Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord!"

And yes, I'm old enough to remember that ketchup commercial!
Gread ads!

zz said...

You and I must have been twins separated at birth, Laurie. I love Barbra Streisand. (Enjoyed the youtube link of the song you sent.) Her diction is exquisite and she has beautiful phrasing. Did you ever see her movie "Yentl" back in the 70s, about a Jewish girl who wants to study the Talmud but is forbidden b/c she's a girl? She cuts her hair short and wears boys' clothes and sets out to become a Hebrew scholar. I remember loving that movie and it made me a real Streisand fan.

Laurie Lynn said...

I'm never sure if I'll offend someone by confessing I like Streisand, but I remembered you said you liked her on a blog comment and I do too!
Love Yentl!
And "What's up Doc?"
And it's so nice to have met you, my long lost sister! ;)

Zoanna said...

I should confess I don't agree with all her socio-political views, but that doesn't stop me from admiring her God-given musical voice.