(The First ) 7 Weird Things About Me

1. I love cars. Old, new, sedans, coupes. Sporty, luxury, doesn't matter. It's the only expensive earthly item I think much about. But I don't covet them. I really don't. It's weird that I never get jealous of someone else's car but I think, "'Boy, I'd love to drive that right now!" and then the urge passes as quickly as it comes. with no discontentment. I want to own a 1980-84 black Jaguar, or at least to ride in one soon. Sometimes I fantasize about having a new car every three weeks or so from now till they take my license away.
2. I am 911 Queen. It's downright embarrassing the number of times I've called 911 while on the road. I'm a real tattler of speeders and love to say, "Yes, he's zooming past exit 74 on I-95, southbound, late-model red Chevy..... No, of course I didn't get the tag number. He was speeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeddddinnnnggg!" I've called 911 for downed wires, traffic lights out, apparent road rage, suspicious behavior, smoke in the air, small children out of their carseats, and every single accident I see.
3. Sometimes when I have conversations in my head, I'll speak out loud. Randomly. We'll be driving along the open road, and I'll be lost in my thoughts, oblivious to passengers, seeing nothing that would jar me into 911 mode.... For example, I might be on the beltway heading to a friend's, thinking about joining a quilting guild one of these days, and in my head I'm conversing with the women about quilt patterns and colorways.
"How about a rail fence in blues, greens, and tans?" I say.
"What are you talking about?...... Who are you talking TO?........ Who said anything about fences?" my passengers have asked, looking perplexed.
I think Sarah and Stephen were actually getting spooked by it, so I have tried to curb it. It's kinda freaky to me, too. (Makes me wonder if it's an early indicator of Alzheimer's.)
4. Some days I just want to move. As in, leave the state, the country. Just for the fun of exploring God's great earth. It's highly motivating to me, so I start rapidly dejunking as if I'm going to be moving. I get it from my mom. We moved 11 times by the time I was 13. I remember just a few of our moves. The only really painful one was from Kansas to Maryland at the end of 4th grade.
5. I would love to try living in every possible arrangement. So far I've lived in: a city apartment alone, a city apartment with friends, an apartment house for internationals (my parents owned it and called it International Friendship House), a farmhouse, a split level in the country, a college dorm with roommates, a dorm room alone, a small town parsonage, government housing, a seminary campus apartment, a rancher in the burbs, a duplex, and single family homes. At times the eccentric author in me wants to take on a new ID and write memoirs of my experiences in disguise. Where would I live? on an island; on a houseboat; in the bush; in a homeless shelter; in a palace; in host families' homes all over the world. 'The only place I would avoid experiencing is prison. My fertile imagination ....
6. I like to eat okra right off the stalk, with salt, in the garden. Haven't done that since 1977.
7. My father-in-law, God rest his soul, was right when he told me I was born with a horseshoe up my butt. Whether it's by strategy, knowledge, or luck (99% luck), I seem to win almost every contest I enter. At baby and bridal showers, find myself taking home candles, note cards, bubble bath, you name it. I've also won countless raffles. Paul has benefited from my horseshoe; when we were dirt poor with two preschoolers and a babe on the way, he ran a 10K race and hung around for prizes afterward. We won an all-expenses paid trip to Tampa, Florida. How does this happen? It's weird. One time I went to a shower and said to myself, "Don't play any games or answer any questions. Just keep quiet in the back. " When I got there, I hung out in the back, unusually quiet. All I had done was write a recipe for the bride to be on an index card, and dropped it in the basket. Just like everyone else. Well, wouldn't you know, after passing up all the games, zipping my lip when I wanted to blurt out my guess to a question, the emcee says, "and one more thing...we're going to draw a recipe card out of this basket, and whoever's name is on it wins this last prize." I hung my head as she read, "and the winner is....." Too bad they don't give away Jags at these things.


I tag you if you have ever won a contest of any kind or if you like okra in any form.